I feel like a big ole pile of shit right now.

I blew up at my family at lunchtime today. I know it's psychotic... but I feel helpless to change.

The chronic pain is making me suicidal. I wish I could have just ONE pain-free day!!!

I'm having an absolutely miserable day. My birthday's on Monday, and I miss my mother so badly around this time... it sux.

Someone stepped in front of a train tonight. I knew someone who did that 11 years ago... what a horrible way to die.

Baby's asleep for now... but I know she's gonna get up in the middle of the night. I need to start putting her back in her crib instead of being lazy and keeping her in bed with me. Keeping her in bed with me means she keeps nursing all night through... and keeping me awake, as each time she wakes up and wants to nurse she wakes me up!

The kids want to go to church Saturday night for some kinda fun night thing. I hope we can get 'em there!

I'm online again, 'til my husband gets up for the night. He's off work tonight because of the holiday. Waiting for him to get up gives me an excuse to try and get caught up again, as I'm currently falling behind...

If the baby doesn't stop waking during the night I'm gonna lose my mind. Ugh!

I just made a "friend test". Curious to see how folks will do on it... http://sistersunshine.friendtest.com

I think I'm about to get stuck with the baby.

Time for another cigarette. Something else I need to give up.

We went to church today... but I'm not getting enough done. I did sweep the kitchen and living room, and put a load of laundry in today... gotta get offline and get some more stuff done soon!!!

Baby's fussing already, so I suppose I should log off and tend to her. I waited all day to get online, but, oh well!!!

Another boring day... not even worth writing about. I did watch a fairly interesting movie this afternoon, though... "Powder".

Sarah's on the phone with Jodi... the little girl who used to live next door.

It's time for Sarah to take her bath, but she's not doing it...

Bob just got up for work, so I guess I can go to bed now...

I'm having a rough time... I'm glad I'm going to the orthopedic surgeon on Tuesday... just not sure what he's gonna be able to do. the pain is really wearing me down, though!

Well, the baby went to bed at 7 last night, so she was up at 5 am and wouldn't go back to sleep. I just now got her to go back to bed... so I think I'm gonna log off and snooze for another hour or two...